I answered the door in my underwear hiding behind the door and said just a minute.when I looked behind me, he ignored me and walked in. I hid behind my blanket. I was told I was going to get messaged or he was going to fuck me. His message include finger penetration and oral sex. I closed my eyes. I screamed no; help. My mouth was covered. I was hit in the head and face more than a dozen time. I closed my eyes. I cried. I fought back. I should have punch him. I was told if I did it again, he would knock me out. I was told he had a knife in his pocket. I was told it was my fault. Told to call him in a week and let him know how I was. I was asked if I liked it. I was told I better like it.
Because I answereed the door in my underwear I asked for it.
Because I am “sexy” I shouldn’t keep it to myself.
Because he didn’t use he penis it wasn’t as bad.
Because I lied about having a boyfriend I deserved it.
Because I submitted after being baten, I consented.
Because I couldn’t get and erection, there was something wrong with me.
Because I’m a male I can’t be raped
And Wednesday, may 1st, I was raped.
The next 6 months of my life I will be fighting to save someone else from being his next victim.
Because I have a voice.
I can’t sleep at night. I stare at my window and thhe crack under my door. I jump at noises and shadows. I flinch when I aam touched. I hide in my room, because he is still free.
Right now I feel like a victime, but I’m fighting because one day I want to not feel this scared.
I’m a survivor.